My Parasite

Pressing the powder upon my face,
All in the hope to hide my disgrace.
If only you could see beyond my shell,
Understand your words are putting me through hell!

I don't want to be this girl anymore,
Broken and tired, heaped on the floor.
I curse the day I became this way,
It leaves me never, it intends to stay!

Please leave me alone now, just let me sleep
Can't you see that you drag me too deep?
I want to be me again, quiet yet sure,
I can not eat, yet food is the cure.

Behind the make up, the routine of disguise,
That where the real me is, that's where she lies.
I turn up the tap, and release the fears,
Over come by weakness, guilt, demonstated in tears!

I will get better, I just don't know how.
I'm sick of you in my head, tired of this row.
Don't you know that I'm stronger than your game?
I'll come around soon, realise I'm still the same!

The girl with the freedom, the girl with a life,
A life that will be worth living, not burdened with strife!
Yet I love you my parasite, what sense does that make?
For now you will be my comfort, until my heart breaks!

I'm looking at it all wrong, this much I know,
I need you Lord Jesus, please don't let me go!
I call to you in the middle of the night,
I can't beat this alone, please help me fight.